Take up your cross?

I often wondered what it really means - this scripture: "If anyone would come after me, he must deny himself and take up his cross daily and follow me." Luke 9:23 

It surely means something different for every follower of Jesus. When everything is perfect and easy, then it's also easy to say "Yes Lord, I will surely carry my cross to follow you". God wants me and my husband to go to England, which means I'm going to leave behind my home country, my family, my friends, my language, my favourite coffee, my favourite bread... and who knows what else? Our move will happen at some point over the next few months. We are following God's lead, His plan. It's awesome and wonderful - and painful at the same time, because my mother is very ill and the last thing I actually feel like doing is leaving her right now. 

I'm asking God during this time: "Why do you send us away right now, when my mum is so ill?" Or: "Why does my mum have to be so ill at all?" I don't know the answer to that, but whenever I think that, what comes to my mind is the above mentioned scripture. This is my cross, this is partly denying myself - denying things I love and that I am used to. 

Letting go so I will be able to follow the trace of God in this life of mine. It's hard. It costs a price. It's a cross. But I'm saying yes. Because Jesus said yes too. He carried the cross for me. Carrying the cross isn't glorious. But the outcome will certainly be.